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X3 album artwork by Esme Rose

Esme Rose · The lyric archive

X3

Returned energy. Reclaimed power. Two feet, one beat.

7 tracks · Lyrics & song meanings

In Esme’s words

Behind the album

The X3 idea runs through the album as consequence and returned energy. Not necessarily some cartoon version of karma where I sit around wishing punishment on people, but the idea that what we put into people and the world has weight. Actions build patterns. Words leave marks. Hurt travels. So does strength. There’s a lot of return to sender in this album, but also a lot of movement. I stop carrying what isn’t mine, reclaim what is, and let people meet the consequences of what they chose to put out there.

By the end, it becomes less about them at all. It’s just: two feet, one beat, keep fucking moving.

Track 01

Devil's Gonna Set Me Free

Behind the song · In Esme’s words

Devil’s Gonna Set Me Free is about realising that sometimes the thing you’ve been warned will destroy you is actually the thing that lets you breathe. The devil is metaphor again. He’s every choice, thought or part of myself I was told belonged on the wrong side of the line. I spent enough time trying to be ‘good’ and still feeling locked in, so eventually I had to question whether the cage was ever protecting me in the first place.

For me, the heart of it is making peace with my shadow instead of trying to cleanse it away. I shake hands with the pieces I was supposed to hide and realise I was never actually lost. That last line matters: I was just locked in. Freedom doesn’t come from somebody arriving to save me. It comes from finally letting myself out.

Lyrics

Momma said pray when the night gets loud Knees on the floor, head hanging down I did the math, I read the signs Heaven been silent a real long time

I tried being good, tried walking straight Every lock still knew my name If salvation's locked behind a door Why does freedom feel like a sin to want more

They told me light don't live in flames But fire's the only thing that ever caught my name That devil's gonna cut my chains loose That devil's gonna let me be

Yeah, the devil's gonna break my shackles That devil's gonna set me free Gold halos crack under borrowed lights Saints get scared when I speak my mind

They sell forgiveness by the pound But guilt's the only thing that's free in this town I made peace with my shadow self Shook hands with the parts I hid from Hell

If law's a war and truth's a crime I take my chances on the other side If I gotta burn to finally breathe Then strike the mesh and watch me leave

That devil's gonna cut my chains loose That devil's gonna let me be Yeah, the devil's gonna break my shackles That devil's gonna set me free

That devil's gonna cut my chains No savior ever came for me Damnation feels like freedom And damn life set me free

That devil's gonna cut my chains loose That devil's gonna let me be Yeah, the devil's gonna break my shackles That devil's gonna set me free

Set me free Set me free Set me free Set me free

That devil's gonna set me free I was never lost I was just locked in

Track 02

I'm That Witch

Behind the song · In Esme’s words

I’m That Witch is pure ownership. There’s no hiding, softening it, explaining myself or trying to make the word ‘witch’ easier for somebody else to swallow. It’s taking everything that was supposed to make me too loud, too wild, too dark or too much and saying, yep. That’s me. Say my fucking name.

It’s also bigger than just me. The song is about that moment when you stop shrinking yourself to fit the room and realise the room can move instead. The rules say pretty, mild, quiet, controlled. The witch kicks the door, shifts the frame and walks in anyway. The confidence isn’t about believing I’m better than anyone. It’s about refusing to be made smaller for being myself.

Lyrics

Lipstick like a warning sign Boots on a churchyard line They try to best this mouth of mine I turn their prayer to fire and wine

You can whisper, you can pray You can try to look away Close your eyes, make a wish Open up, I'm still that witch

I'm that witch, bitch, say my name Holy high, I feel no shame Strike that spark, light that flame Whole damn room gonna know my name

I'm that witch, bitch, say my name Stand up tall, don't hide the flame Kick that door, shift the frame By the end they cheer my name

No glass slipper, no disguise No soft halo in my eyes I was built from darker skies Hear the thunder when I rise

They want pretty, they want mild They want quiet, they want style Not built small, not built mild Every rule just makes me wild

Hear the floor before I speak Feel the pulse before the beat Close your eyes, make a wish Open up, I'm still that witch

I'm that witch, bitch, say my name Holy high, I feel no shame Strike that spark, light that flame Whole damn room gonna know my name

I'm that witch, bitch, say my name Stand up tall, don't hide the flame Kick that door, shift the frame By the end they cheer my name

They cheer my name Say once, say twice Feel that shift in the lies Hands up, don't flinch

Whole world open up, I'm still that witch I'm that witch, bitch, say my name Holy high, I feel no shame Strike that spark, light that flame

Whole damn room gonna know my name Bitch, say my name Stand up tall, don't hide the flame Kick that door, shift the frame

By the end they cheer my name I'm that witch, bitch, say my name Bitch, say my name.

Track 03

Ain't No Heaven For a Girl Like Me

Behind the song · In Esme’s words

Ain’t No Heaven For a Girl Like Me is about the impossible little box women are still expected to fit inside. Be soft. Be pure. Don’t want too much. Don’t be angry. Don’t be sexual. Don’t be difficult. And if heaven requires me to become that version of myself to get through the door, then maybe I don’t want the fucking door.

The heaven and hell imagery is really about acceptance versus freedom. I’d rather be honest, bruised, loud and alive than behave perfectly for a reward somebody else invented. There’s also something collective in this one. It changes from me to girls like me, because these expectations aren’t mine alone. If the cage was built for all of us, then maybe freedom looks like all of us deciding we don’t have to kneel.

Lyrics

They said, be soft, be pure, be still Cross your legs, don't chase the thrill Wear the white, don't ask for more But I kick the halo out the door

I lit candles with my rage Turned their scriptures into flame I was never yours to name And I ain't here to play that game

Ain't no heaven for girls like me Just back roads, bruises, and prophecy Built a throne on our silent sea But I brought matches and now I bleed

Ain't no heaven for girls like me Just black lines, ghosts, and blistered knees You made your hell and gave us the key So I broke the lock, then I set me free

They said, repent and hold your shame But I sang louder when they said my name I ain't your rib, I ain't your bride I'm the sin you couldn't hide

I wear hexes like perfume I plant curses under moons I don't break, I bloom From every cage You made a tomb

Ain't no heaven for girls like me Just dirt roads and heresy You preached love, then let us bleed But I rose up, wicked and free

No heaven for girls like me We don't kneel, we don't agree You want saints? Well baby, we're the breeze Your heaven smells like bleach and fear

I'd rather riot than worship here Ain't no heaven for girls like me Just backroads, bruises, and prophecy You built a throne on our silent sea

But I brought matches and now I bleed Ain't no heaven for girls like me Just bloodlines, ghosts, and blistered knees But hell looks good when you're finally free

We light the dark and we don't flee

Track 04

Karma's A Bitch, Boy

Behind the song · In Esme’s words

Karma’s A Bitch, Boy isn’t really a revenge song. That’s the important bit. I’m not casting something at somebody or waiting around hoping their life falls apart. I’m saying actions accumulate. Break enough trust and eventually nobody trusts you. Burn enough bridges and eventually you’re standing on your own side of the river. That isn’t magic punishing you. That’s consequence.

That’s why I say karma isn’t cruel or kind. She doesn’t need to be. What you keep feeding eventually becomes the thing you have to live with. There’s actually something freeing in that because it means I don’t have to chase revenge or carry somebody else’s behaviour around with me. I can leave it where it belongs and let them carry the weight of what they chose.

Lyrics

You can say what you want When no one's around You can play real smart Run your mouth in town

You can take your shot You can cross that line But some things wait and they take their time I don't mean heaven, I don't mean fate

I mean they stack up and they don't stay late Karma's a bitch, boy, today's the day Not tomorrow, not someday Karma's a bitch, boy, stay straight

You don't outrun it, you just meet Your fate (Ooh-ooh) (Ooh-ooh) If you break enough trust You walk alone

If You burn that bridge You feel the cold You can laugh it off You can call it love

But karma don't care if you're good enough I'm not wishing, I'm not mad I just watch you burn what you finally had Karma's a bitch, boy, today's the day

No smoke, no grace Karma's a bitch, boy, hands clean Those safe hands better feel the weight (Ooh-ooh) (Ooh-ooh) She's not cruel, she's not kind

She just shows up right on time Karma's a bitch, boy, today's the day Say it once, let it stay Karma's a bitch, boy, no delay

What you fed it, that's what it ate Karma's a bitch, boy, today's the day Round and round, in the same damn place Karma's a bitch, boy, no escape

Live clean Or carry the weight (Ooh-ooh) (Ooh-ooh) (Ooh-ooh)

(Ooh-ooh)

Track 05

As It Is Willed

Behind the song · In Esme’s words

As It Is Willed is probably the closest thing on the album to a literal return-to-sender spell. But even here, the point isn’t revenge. I’m not asking for pain back with interest. I’m withdrawing myself from it. What somebody sent towards me belongs to them, and I don’t have to keep holding it just because they gave it to me.

There’s a boundary hidden inside all the spellwork. I step aside, reclaim my own life and let everything else go where it naturally goes. What you gave is what you’ll know. That’s X3 in one of its clearest forms: energy, choices and consequences moving in circles, without me needing to become the person who caused the hurt in the first place.

Lyrics

Let the liar taste the sound Of silence breaking through the bone Of every mask they've ever known I won't curse, I won't cry

But energy never says goodbye It circles back, it finds its flame And calls the shadows by their name As it is willed, so let it be

Return to sender, one, two, three Not with hate, but sacred law Balance binds what I withdraw I light no black, I break no bone

But truth will carve itself in stone You cannot run from what you gave Your choices echo from the grave The seeds you sowed are cracking through

The roots are wrapped around your shoes The ground remembers every tread The storm you cast will rain instead I see you fall in your own fire

I see the truth behind desire I speak no harm, I cast no knife But I reclaim my sacred life As it is willed, so let it be

Return to sender, one, two, three Not with hate, but sacred law Balance binds what I withdraw I step aside

I let it flow What you gave Is what you'll know As it is willed, so let it be

Return to sender, one, two, three No revenge, just holy thread You tied the knot, now walk the web So let it be

Track 06

123

Behind the song · In Esme’s words

123 takes that same idea and strips most of the mysticism away. People throw words and actions around like they disappear once the moment is over, but they don’t. They change relationships, change how people see you, create patterns and eventually come back in ways you probably could have predicted if you’d paid attention.

The line I love in this one is essentially: this isn’t faith, it’s physics. You don’t need a god keeping score. Push hard enough on the world and something eventually pushes back. That’s where the title X3 really lands for me. The three isn’t about sitting there counting punishments. It’s a reminder to be careful what you put out, because somewhere down the line you might meet it again.

Lyrics

You throw words like they don't weigh Like they won't circle back your way You talk rough, you move fast Like nothing you do is built to last

You think it's just heat, just noise, just air Like damage disappears in thin prayer But I've been watching patterns long enough To know the math behind your bluff

What you give comes back (one, two, three) Say it again (one, two, three) You throw it out, you plant that seed Don't look shocked When it comes back to me

You sow fear, you grow control You feed your hunger, starve your soul You laugh it off, call it a game 'Til the echo answers in your name

I don't chase, I don't warn I just step aside and let it form I don't curse, I don't fight I trust the turn of day to night

What you give comes back (one, two, three) Say it again (one, two, three) You throw it out, you plant that seed Don't look shocked When it comes back to me

This isn't faith, this is physics Push the world, it pushes with interest You don't need gods to keep the score You just need time, it does the work

What you give comes back (one, two, three) Every word, every deed You made the move, you chose the key Don't blame fate That was you times three

Track 07

Kick Drum

Behind the song · In Esme’s words

Kick Drum is where the album stops looking backwards. It’s about movement. Not proving myself, not convincing anyone, not waiting for approval. Just that physical moment where something hits in your chest and reminds you that you’re still here, so you put your feet down, lift your head and fucking move. Strength in this song isn’t being untouchable. It’s being able to bend without continually breaking.

That’s why it feels like the right ending for X3. After all the talk of judgement, consequence, returning energy and taking power back, eventually you have to stop staring at what happened and live. You don’t need permission, faith or even a perfect understanding of where you’re going. Sometimes instinct is enough. Left foot truth, right foot rage. Step by step. The spell at the end of this album is momentum.

Lyrics

Every time the kick drum hits, I rise. Boots to the dirt, chin up, no disguise. You talk big, but you don't move right I walk truth, and it shakes the night.

I don't chase approval, I chase impact, I'm the crack in the ground where your pride retracts. I'm the breath you hold when the beat gets loud, The part of you that stops shrinking for once

And stands proud. Don't confuse the voice for the vessel, don't confuse the echo for the metal. Strength ain't a pose or a quote or a trend

It's the moment you stop breaking And start choosing to bend. This ain't soft. This ain't safe.

This ain't pretty. It's pace. If it moves your blood, that's enough You don't gotta understand it,

Just keep up. Every time the kick drum hits, I rise. Boots to the dirt, chin up, no disguise. You talk big, but you don't move right

I walk truth, and it shakes the night. I'm not here for the talkers, I'm here for the movers. The ones who turn pressure

Into something that proves us. I'm the pulse behind the rib you forgot you had, The nod of your head when the world goes bad. I don't preach, I provoke.

I don't claim, I evoke. I don't break when they choke I just breathe through the smoke. If the rhythm hits hard, that's on purpose.

If your chest wakes up, that's deserved. You don't need faith, you don't need permission Just two feet, one beat, And the will to listen.

Every time the kick drum hits, I rise. Boots to the dirt, chin up, no disguise. You talk big, but you don't move right I walk truth, and it shakes the night.

Left foot truth, right foot rage. Step by step, page by page. This is the part where the quiet breaks. This is the part where the pulse remakes.

Every time the kick drum hits, I rise. Boots to the dirt, chin up, no disguise. Say what you want, I move by instinct. Talk your game, babe.

But I'm the one who hits.